12/05/97

When should my child start preschool?

Q:  Everyone commented about how sociable and bright my three year old was, so I thought he would love going to a preschool a few mornings a week.  After only a few weeks there he's miserable.  He doesn't like the activities or the teacher and his self-esteem has plummeted.  What do I do?  I don't want him to develop a negative attitude toward school so young!

A:  Meet with the teacher and discuss your concerns.  Also arrange to spend a couple mornings there yourself, to observe and participate. After that, if things don't steadily improve, pull him out.

Children can experience the benefits of preschooling in numerous ways which don't always involve formal programs.  Socialization and enrichment groups at home, library or church can serve the same purpose.

You sense correctly that your son's attitude toward school is very important.  You certainly don't want him to develop a negative set of ideas and feelings about school before he even gets started!

To help guide your son's social development, encourage him to invite a friend over now and then, so you can monitor play skills, such as sharing, turn-taking and empathy.  If you're confident his social development is progressing well and his self-confidence has returned, you may want to try preschooling again at age four.  But do your homework.  There are many different preschool programs available with a large range of teaching styles, equipment and educational philosophies. Visit, observe and talk with other parents before you make your selection.

The following Internet site, designed for parents of children from preschool to kindergarten age, offers additional perspectives about schooling and other issues in early childhood: http://www.kinderguide.com/

Please send questions or comments to bbruno@snet.net.