04/27/2001

Education of Gifted Children

Q: My son just turned six and is in kindergarten. He is an intense child with a thirst for knowledge, who was reading by age 3. He has been tested and according to results is reading at a "full adult level." While it is a blessing to have a gifted child, how do I make the most of his education without holding him back or pushing him too far ahead? I have come to the realization that most of the extra support in school goes to children who are not meeting expectations, not to those who could accelerate beyond expectations.

A: I recently wrote an article about gifted education at the Teachers.Net. I refer you to the article because it contains several references to books, a publishing house that specializes in books and other materials for the gifted, and other Web sites about educating children with exceptional gifts. Even though the article is directed toward teachers, most of it is relevant for parents as well. I hope you find it useful.

You might also be interested in reading a book I just completed called "Wild Tulips." (See related article.)It is about raising children across the age spectrum -- a collection of enlightening (I hope) essays about my parenting experiences and professional experiences as a school psychologist. Many of the stories touch on the social and emotional development of exceptional children.

References aside, here are some considerations for your six-year-old. Your son began reading when my daughter did (age 3). I admit I was quite astonished as well as excited about her "discovery" that those black lines on the page had meaning. She still remembers that discovery vividly, and she is now 24. My husband and I accepted early on that it was our responsibility to expand the education of our children beyond school walls.

Teachers did a wonderful job throughout the grades in helping our daughter expand her knowledge by grouping her for projects with other capable students and encouraging her to pursue independent studies (in later grades). We discussed private schooling for high school and explored the possibility, but our daughter decided that she wanted to be part of the community we lived in, so she remained in the public schools. Again, many teachers adapted the regular curriculum to challenge and engage her. She participated in many special programs offered after school and on weekends (sometimes in other communities), some that teachers recommended and others that we discovered.

For example, she attended classes every summer (after 8th grade) through the Johns Hopkins Center for Talented Youth. The classes are held at colleges throughout the country (see reference below). She also participated in the Youth in Government program sponsored by the YMCA and run by teachers at her high school (an extra credit program held afternoons and weekends -- not during regular school hours) -- an outstanding, hands-on program for learning about the legislative process, ending each Spring in a weekend mock legislative session in Hartford, when students literally "take over" the Legislative Office Building at the capitol and present bills for debate and passage as legislators, lieutenant gov, clerk, etc. Each year the students form political parties, hold elections, take offices and act out the roles of those offices during the culminating weekend. The benefits to students who participate in special annual programs like these are priceless.

Our daughter made friendships that will last throughout her life. It was worth all the extra time, effort and money to hear her say, "Wow, Mom, the kids here are just like me!" Gifted children are not necessarily advanced in their emotional development. In fact, the contrast between intellectual skills and social/emotional ones can be VERY frustrating for these children. Our daughter went through periods of feeling odd, ostracized and unpopular. We are thankful that she let us know her feelings, so we could listen and offer support. Parents of friends and an occasional teacher became confidantes, as well.

Other children withdraw, refuse to do their best work or lash out in anger in school and at home. These are normal reactions to frustration, too, and need to be recognized as such. I encourage parents to seek counseling support if such negative feelings persist to the point of undermining academic, social or emotional growth.

Finally, keep reading, attending parenting meetings and asking questions of family members and friends. Attend school functions, establish reliable lines of communication with teachers, listen to your child and encourage him or her to bring frustrations and worries out into the open. And most of all, recognize that a gifted child is more like everyone else than he or she is different. Help your child see that each one of his or her friends has unique gifts, too, that they can nurture and discover together.

Resources

Kidsource: extensive listing of articles and links about gifted education.

Center for Talented Youth (CTY), Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore, Maryland: summer institutes for talented youth.

National Research Center on the Gifted and Talented (NRC/GT) at the University of Connecticut (UCONN).

Creative Learning Press

Please send questions or comments to bbruno@snet.net.