02/24/98

Infant Brain: An Unwritten Symphony

In response to Infant Brain: An Unwritten Symphony

Many SNET readers are making the commitment to stay home with their infants, even when it means reduced income. They see involved parenting as the best gift they can give to their children.

• I am a mother of 13 month old twins, a boy and a girl, who are loving, curious, happy, and very much interested in everything around them. I have been singing and playing guitar and piano to them almost every day since they were born. When I cannot do anything live with them, we play music on the stereo, and dance. I have discovered my boy has a strong preference for singing and humming, while my girl would rather play the instrument herself. I did this while they were still in utero, as well. It is so true, what research is showing, that their tiny brains are little sponges. My husband and L spend all our time with them, it seems. He chose a 4 day workweek to give them more time with him. All four of us also go to a playgroup once a week. We knew that we wanted to provide an enriched environment for them. You don't have to be rich to do these things, either. We take them out to breakfast once a week, or lunch if we can. We take them outside and let them touch leaves, snow, puddles (they are only just starting to walk). We let them explore as much of their and our world as we can. Boxes, crinkled paper, small objects sealed shut in salt shakers -- they love to hear the noise from inside. There is so much to do with them, we will never run out of things. We have taken them into the forest to watch the birds. We touch the flowers, and smell the roses in the backyard. Providing so much for them to do and feel and see and touch and taste has helped us learn about them, and we are certain it is helping their brains form vital connections for the rest of their lives. If you are really in tune with your kids, you don't need research to guide the way. My husband and I have been blessed with huge imaginations, and besides loving and cuddling them and being supportive, it is the best gift we can pass along. -- Give Babies Sensory Experiences

• It's exactly because of the reasons you wrote that my wife and I decided to raise our new son ourselves. Since my wife is nursing the baby and I had the higher paying job, who quit her job to be a full-time mom. I can't think of anyone I'd rather have caring for my son and she can't either. My wife is a highly educated, intelligent, loving and devoted mom. How could we live with ourselves if we compromised on our son's development for the sake of making more money? -- Give Your Baby the Gift of You

• I feel we waste our children here in America by giving them back to homes that are abusive or neglectful. My brother-in-law is a police officer and he takes children out of abusive situations only to do it all over again a few weeks later. There are couples as well as single people who could love and build up these children. We are short-sighted in this country about our children. -- Adoptive Parent

• I have been working nights for the past eight years in order to care for my children during the day and avoid the whole daycare saga. My experiences with a daycare provider were not good. My wife and I would get a call the morning we were dropping off our children and told the provider couldn't take care of them that day. Then one of us had to take the day off from work. I was fortunate that I could change shifts. It was the best decision I ever made. My children grew up in their own home and dad and mom were always there for them. -- Work a Different Shift

In response to "Account Overdrawn"

Readers continued to write in about money management, debt, and credit blues. Many told about how they managed to get back on stable financial ground.