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	05/08/98

Match Your Needs to the School

In response to High School Pressure Cooker (4/23/98)

There are hundreds of fine colleges and universities in the United States and around the world. Hard working, dedicated students can find excellent opportunities for the pursuit of their ambitions in any number of well-taught, challenging programs offered at junior colleges or the Big 10, colleges without walls or work/study programs, at the Sorbonne or at Nolles (survival schools). One parent summed up the important issues well when she wrote:

"My bright senior daughter is not competitive and not a traditional learner. She has always done well in school, gets great teacher recommendations. She involves herself in many outside activities. In our household we commit time to community service, a tradition she has internalized without pressure from us. She gets along well with people of every age and a variety of backgrounds. And she is happy.
Long ago she said she wanted a school that allowed her to learn independently, but this has not been a possibility where we live. Absent that option, she has taken the position that if 100% and 90% are both A's, why go for 100% if it keeps you from something else important in your life? She takes advanced courses to challenge herself, while some classmates choose whatever class assures them an "A" for maximum class standing. She has tutored competitive students, especially in math, even some who outrank her in the class standings. After we had an exchange student live with us for a year, she decided she wanted to travel, so has taken an intensive year of foreign language at UCONN. She won't be valedictorian, and we don't care. She is remarkably well-rounded, independent, responsible, decent and funny. She believes the world is open to her and that she can accomplish anything she sets as a goal.
The idea that anyone would allow a school to define one's options in life is a little frightening. It seems to me that we should evaluate our options and make a school choice based on the options as we define them.
This gets me to Ivy League schools. I do a fair amount of hiring, mostly young attorneys. They come from all types of schools and backgrounds, but rarely from the Ivies because we are a charity and don't pay big salaries. Among those we have hired, the most independent and creative are rarely from the Ivies. Aiming high for oneself should not mean aiming for status.
To the extent there is pressure on kids, why not shift it to building well-rounded members of our communities? We only live once. Why not learn to value what is really important? -- Match Your Needs to the School
Please send questions or comments to bbruno@snet.net.
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